From Plate to Palate; A Fertility Journey Part 2

From Plate to palate; A fertility journey Part 2

Do you ever get those days where you think ‘why is this happening’? I get those now and then about my fertility journey – sometimes, that negative energy gets to me, and I start wondering if I really want to get pregnant. Or, if it's just the thought of wanting a family is what I'd LIKE, but maybe not what's best for me. I get to thinking about what the reasons are that my husband and I haven't been able to conceive up to this point. And, then my thoughts just go all over the place. Should I just be focusing on my healing process? My husband? Just be happy that I am a fortunate Auntie to 5 beautiful nieces? My business? Supporting others on their healing journeys? Then, the thoughts go further into space…maybe the Lord has a different path for me, and maybe I'm not capable of rearing my own children, and I have a different purpose in life? Overthinker? Yeah, probably.

When that happens, I just try my best to give it to God because I'm not running this show. I know that. But, those feelings are L-O-U-D! Then there is a stronger feeling deep in my heart where I can see myself and my husband having a family, and those thoughts of what I am supposed to be focusing become clearer – focusing on my healing and growth process is where I am supposed to be at. So, right where I am at right now. I feel that many of the things I am doing are working to get us closer to starting a family of our own. But, not just that...it’s working to help me heal and grow spiritually and emotionally for my soul. I can’t truly explain how, but I just feel it in my heart.

I've decided to turn up the heat on the natural healing techniques, and try additional avenues to really open up the energy centers and blocked energy in my body. The more I learn about them, the more I know in my heart that I have so much healing to do. But, then again, don’t we all? And, won’t we always have more healing to do? Yes, it’s a never-ending process. However, if we don’t work on that as much as possible, how much will we actually have built up inside of us, and how is it manifesting in our bodies? Yikes!

So, what natural healing techniques have I found to be helping? Prayer: I just love the all of the feelings that I get when I pray: a sense of relaxation, healing, calm, protection, optimism. And, those are just to name a few. Meditation: I haven't been as consistent with meditation as I'd like within the past few years, but I’ve been trying more recently over the past few months to take more time for myself a few times a week and get meditation in, even if it’s for 5-10 minutes. It’s so soothing, and really helps calm my mind and body. I’ve even started doing more new moon and full moon meditations (I can explain this, more in depth, another time) – they’re amazing.

Something else that I have opened my mind up more to over the past few years that has yielded some amazing personal growth opportunities is paying attention to things around me like numerology and other small signs that signify that we aren’t ever alone on our journeys, regardless of how much we can feel alone in these types of situations. I feel that there are always spirit guides and angels waiting to help us, comfort us, say hello, etc. Why, even as I am writing this, I stopped to look at the clock, and it said 3:33! I have been getting that sequence often lately…or 11:11, or just any same-number sequence. And, so I have to share about the meaning behind it: “The number 333 has a lot of significance. If you’re seeing this number often, the universe is sending energy your way. Or, 333 can also represent the essence of the Trinity of mind, body and spirit.” While this thought process can seem a little out there, it’s so far from that. We are taught that it’s a little out there…a little woo-woo, but it’s really not. It’s part of how we are all SO connected to each other and this universe if we just paid attention a little more!

A few other things that I have been exploring are breath transformation, Mayan abdominal massage, reflexology, cupping, acupuncture, reiki, and moon cycles. I am loving all of it! Stay tuned for more information on them, and how they are helping on my fertility journey (and, just life in general). Be blessed!

Thanks

Annette Licitra

Integrative Health Coach + Wellness Chef

630.965.6454

Passionette Palate

http://passionettepalate.com/

*Schedule an appointment with me here*: https://www.vyte.in/annette@passionettepalate.com

The Dirty Little secret

The dirty little secret





Your typically excited at the idea that your married and ready to conceive. How hard can it be right? Your intimate with your spouse and BAM! Your pregnant. For most that is exactly how it may happen. There is also a percentage of women that unfortunately like me it doesn't happen that easily.

I remember how excited I was for preparing to have my husband and I first child. We started and nothing. We eventually started ovulation kits, period tracker apps, then I called my OB GYN
Dr. Beister  from Partners of Woman health who checked to see if there was any blockages in the tubes or was there anything to be concerned about. There was nothing. I had a clean bill of health. We went back to it. I became ridiculous. I would call my husband and say " I'm ovulating can you come home for lunch"? eventually it became a chore to him. I though I would never hear the day when my husband would say he can't perform under these circumstances. I was putting to much stress on him.

The funny thing is I was on the phone with my sister and she said "Hey! did you get your menstrual"? of course, I didn't realize I had been unbearable to deal with. She mentioned I had been moody and mean. I checked my period tracker since I decided to be more relaxed about monitoring and it said your 45 days late. I started to scream, jump and became so excited I started to drop my phone. On Thursday evening I took a pregnancy test and it was official I AM PREGNANT. I took a picture of the positive test and texted it to my husband and called him all at the same time. He could hardly understand me. Finally we did it. We are pregnant. Yay!!

I wake up Friday still riding off the high of it all. My husband kiss the belly. We start to plan our future, figuring how and when will we tell everyone?  On Saturday I wake up and the Hubby handles his weekend errands as usual. I'm on the phone with my sister and realize my stomach is hurting I go to the bathroom and there is blood. No!? What is this? In her calmest voice she tells me to go to the hospital now. I head over and call the hubby.

The worst day of my life has begun. My heart is racing, I feel a emptiness and fear. I find out I have an ectopic. My baby is in my fallopian tube. I am devastated, I have to choose to do a shot of methotrexate or remove the tube. In my mind I'm killing my baby. What if it can detach? Who says it can't happen? I believe in miracles.  I decide to reluctantly do the methotrexate and thinking everything is okay. I continue my days mourning what could have been. I found myself being thankful we found out we can have a baby now its just a matter of healing and moving forward. While working I notice my insides are hurting and I feel like something just isn't right. I get home and off we go to the hospital. After a 6 day hospital stay my fallopian tube has ruptured and I am now bleeding internally. I have to have emergency surgery to remove the tube I wanted to salvage. The scariest thing in the world is to have your family all in a lobby praying for you as you go into a surgery. Your very first surgery ever. I could see the concern and worry on my husband face.  

Now our journey to conceive has become altered. Why can't I just simply have a baby. The one thing women are design to do without question. I find myself with my husband in Fertility clinics of Illinois in Oakbrook with Dr. Ulher discussing our options. We left there with so much hope, peace and joy. it was God who led us to her. After 2 cycles we have our little precious Elianna. We are now parents.

I wish that women would speak more of the struggle, the disappointment and expectation when trying to conceive. You hear about miscarriage, still birth and premature delivers that result in loss of infant. You rarely hear about fertility issues and you rarely ever hear about ectopic pregnancies. I was very angry when I had my experience. After the experience  I had friends tell me "sure I know what that is I had two. I don't have either of my fallopian tubes" or I heard stories of women having at least one ectopic or having a family member that experienced it. The one thing that bothers me the most is that in the African American community women don't share their personal experience. They never share  to know their story. They do not want to give the impression they are less of a women. The pride in the community can be crippling.

African American women we must share our experiences in life to educate the next generations. The elders have a job and it appears we are not hearing the necessary stories. Now being a Doula I am very open and candid about pregnancy to help women understand no matter the situations it is a beautiful experience.   I like to have my families that I work with enjoy the pregnancy experience but also discuss the tuff stuff. Most mothers aren't sharing with their spouse about their fears, concerns and worries. The spouses aren't being honest either. They are hiding their feelings as well. I love having them deal with this and what I really love is it brings them closer once they understand how the other feels. To have your spouse be a support to you in every way during the pregnancy is important.

Women I hold you responsible. Be honest with yourself as well as those around you. Share your story with friends and family. More importantly share with your daughters when they are older. Let's prepare others and let them know they aren't alone. I remember that was one emotion I felt during my healing process. My husband was awesome. I just needed someone who had that experience to support me.

Find support groups for women who have had your experience. You can counsel through your church. If you don't have a church home you can find a neighborhood church that shares your same beliefs and meet with a Pastor there or you can make an appointment with counselors near you.

If you have an opportunity to prevent postpartum depression even if you experience a stillbirth please consider keeping your placenta and encapsulating to improve your chances of recovering physically and emotionally from the experience in addition to the counseling and support groups. www.peacefulbirthingdoula.com

 I have a list of groups if your need suggestions. I hope you find them helpful.

Tunisia Macklin
Peaceful Birthing Doula
Educate, Encourage, Empower and Serving Women
http://www.peacefulbirthingdoula.com
peacefulbirthingdoula@gmail.com
(630)481-6079

www.peacefulbirthingdoula.com

www.facebook.com/peacefulbirthingdoula

www.twitter.com/peacefulbdoula

www.instagram.com/peacefulbdoula

www.meierclinics.com

www.stillbirthay.com 

www.dupagecris.org

www.edwards.org/wings

www.facebook.com/ectopicpregnancysupport

 www.ICAN.com
www.compassionatefriends.org

If your currently pregnant and looking for support I have availability www.peacefulbirthingdoula.com