Honor- Protect- Encourage in Life, Labor, Birth and Postpartum recover
I have had the pleasures to support many families from different cultures, religions and economical backgrounds. I learned that everyone believe that birth is only about vaginal, C-section birth and on your back. You have many options. Women do not realize you can birth your way. It has been my honored to encourage women to birth their way and to make sure they have peace in the efforts they made to birth their little bundle of joy.
You will hear many stories of birth from many different women. Why is it they are always willing to share the worst of their experience? Why do women think it is helpful to speak frightening things and expect a great out come from the person you shared with prior to their birth?
The moment I meet a family I mention to them "never have conversation about birth with anyone other than the person you can have a similar birth to and that will be your Mother or Grand Mother". If your Mother isn't with you or your not speaking with her then you can possibly get great information from your Sister, but please go no further.
The moment I meet a family I mention to them "never have conversation about birth with anyone other than the person you can have a similar birth to and that will be your Mother or Grand Mother". If your Mother isn't with you or your not speaking with her then you can possibly get great information from your Sister, but please go no further.
I have seen women experience birth standing, squatting, sidelining and hands and knees. Everyone of these women experienced birth their way and made sure they were able to have a strong support team that will support and encourage them along the way. Every effort you make to improve your birthing options the more you are likely to manifest your birth. Your mindset is during the time of your pregnancy, labor, birth and postpartum recovery will make a huge difference. I believe you should not have any expectation on your experience. You should have an idea of what you would like for your experience to be so you can keep a positive outlook and develop your village around that idea. Whether you experience that birth exactly is not in your control this is why you are particular about your village they will help you with the outcome of your birthing experience.
Women have been giving birth before we could even keep track. Mary birthed Jesus and she didn't have a hospital. Please do not misunderstand what I am saying there is a time and place to utilize hospitals. Every birth doesn't have to take place in a hospital. I have witnessed births in homes, birthing centers and hospitals and each family had their reason for the decision to give birth in those settings. I loved every single birth and believe the majority of those births took place in the perfect place for the family, however some families made decisions out of fear due to miss information and later felt they missed out on a different experience. I do not allow families to regret their experiences. No matter what you think the outcomes is still beautiful and you learn from the experience. This is a learning experience.
Birth and Breastfeeding is one of the most discussed topics amongst women. I have experienced some of the most dis hearting conversations lately. Some women have experienced little support from family members. Many of the things I have heard mentioned were " Why are you breastfeeding that is to much". "Breastfeeding isn't enough you need to feed that baby", That is so disgusting you need to cover up or go somewhere else with that". "How long are you going to breastfeed"? Just image how a woman will feel when she is trying and not receiving any support. I have even witnessed fathers who come from families who do not understand actually not support the mother.
We have to not just educate each other we also have to educate and encourage the support of others around them. I remember breastfeeding my daughter, My husband was so supportive in the simple things. He would make sure I had plenty of water, oatmeal and I always had a place to breastfeed that was quite and clean for me and our daughter. It made for a beautiful experience. Though we had a few hiccups on him understanding when it was okay to toss out milk or monitor the time milk was out of the fridge. We eventually got it under control. Boy did it take a while to get him to understand liquid gold. Lol!!
We have to speak as women to one another about physicians, midwifes and hospital experiences. It doesn't mean for you to tell horror stories. We as women should share our story with grace. Please don't frighten anyone with your story and them wonder why they choose not to attempt a natural birth. We have to share. We especially should share with out children. My Mother not shared with we I was able to observe her in labor and because of that I went into my birthing ad breastfeeding experience open minded and so full of love and courage. My experience was definitely a challenge with a sunny side up baby, long back labor but I absolutely enjoyed it because I was laboring not like my Mother but like my mother if you understand.
I had a Mother I supported who had her baby at 23 weeks. As we were speaking after the birth she mentioned her Mother shared with her after she gave birth to her baby that she was a 23 week birth. Now there is nothing she could have done to prevent the birth, however she could have known there is a possibility she may give birth early and mention it to physician. This Mother was shocked and hurt about finding out so late. This is exactly why we need to speak. I am sadden that especially in the community of Women of Color we do not talk. Please share your story. Please Honor one another story, Encourage one another in life, labor, birth and postpartum recovery.
Tips on when to share:
1. Never be afraid to share your story it is very healing.
2. If you do not want to verbally share your story journaling is also a great way to share until you are ready to speak.
3.Most importantly please do not over exaggerate your story if it wasn't an experience you were anticipating.
4.If you have experienced a traumatic birth please inform the person before hand that who is asking about your birth story before sharing.
Remember we are a village, we are here to assist in each others growth as individuals in life experiences.
Women have been giving birth before we could even keep track. Mary birthed Jesus and she didn't have a hospital. Please do not misunderstand what I am saying there is a time and place to utilize hospitals. Every birth doesn't have to take place in a hospital. I have witnessed births in homes, birthing centers and hospitals and each family had their reason for the decision to give birth in those settings. I loved every single birth and believe the majority of those births took place in the perfect place for the family, however some families made decisions out of fear due to miss information and later felt they missed out on a different experience. I do not allow families to regret their experiences. No matter what you think the outcomes is still beautiful and you learn from the experience. This is a learning experience.
Birth and Breastfeeding is one of the most discussed topics amongst women. I have experienced some of the most dis hearting conversations lately. Some women have experienced little support from family members. Many of the things I have heard mentioned were " Why are you breastfeeding that is to much". "Breastfeeding isn't enough you need to feed that baby", That is so disgusting you need to cover up or go somewhere else with that". "How long are you going to breastfeed"? Just image how a woman will feel when she is trying and not receiving any support. I have even witnessed fathers who come from families who do not understand actually not support the mother.
We have to not just educate each other we also have to educate and encourage the support of others around them. I remember breastfeeding my daughter, My husband was so supportive in the simple things. He would make sure I had plenty of water, oatmeal and I always had a place to breastfeed that was quite and clean for me and our daughter. It made for a beautiful experience. Though we had a few hiccups on him understanding when it was okay to toss out milk or monitor the time milk was out of the fridge. We eventually got it under control. Boy did it take a while to get him to understand liquid gold. Lol!!
We have to speak as women to one another about physicians, midwifes and hospital experiences. It doesn't mean for you to tell horror stories. We as women should share our story with grace. Please don't frighten anyone with your story and them wonder why they choose not to attempt a natural birth. We have to share. We especially should share with out children. My Mother not shared with we I was able to observe her in labor and because of that I went into my birthing ad breastfeeding experience open minded and so full of love and courage. My experience was definitely a challenge with a sunny side up baby, long back labor but I absolutely enjoyed it because I was laboring not like my Mother but like my mother if you understand.
I had a Mother I supported who had her baby at 23 weeks. As we were speaking after the birth she mentioned her Mother shared with her after she gave birth to her baby that she was a 23 week birth. Now there is nothing she could have done to prevent the birth, however she could have known there is a possibility she may give birth early and mention it to physician. This Mother was shocked and hurt about finding out so late. This is exactly why we need to speak. I am sadden that especially in the community of Women of Color we do not talk. Please share your story. Please Honor one another story, Encourage one another in life, labor, birth and postpartum recovery.
Tips on when to share:
1. Never be afraid to share your story it is very healing.
2. If you do not want to verbally share your story journaling is also a great way to share until you are ready to speak.
3.Most importantly please do not over exaggerate your story if it wasn't an experience you were anticipating.
4.If you have experienced a traumatic birth please inform the person before hand that who is asking about your birth story before sharing.
Remember we are a village, we are here to assist in each others growth as individuals in life experiences.
Peaceful Birthing Doula
Educate, Encourage, Empower and Serving Women
peacefulbirthingdoula@gmail.com
(630)481-6079
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